Cattle Abduction

A pasture outside Sala City. Dook is watching anxiously as a 1950:es flying saucer is using an energy beam to suck cows up into its innards.

Flops comes running, carrying a broadsheet newspaper. He removes the staples and expertly folds the loose paper sheets into a FIM-92 Stinger missile and associated launcher. He loads the missile into the tube, shoulders the weapon, takes aim and pulls the trigger. Neither Dook nor Flops are surprised when the weapon actually fires, and they watch the missile streak toward the flying saucer, striking it and causing it to fall out of the sky and land on its side in the field.

Dook applauds, and an offscreen tennis audience claps along while a sports channel style infographic briefly pops up announcing the score is Flops: 15 - [illegible alien script]: love and that the event is sponsored by Posh♔Gits (est. 1866).

A number of cows climb out of the stricken flying saucer through the hole made by the missile and run off, indignantly mooing. Dook counts them on his fingers.

Dook: That's all of them. Farmer MacGreg will be happy.

Flops [grimly]: That'll teach those aliens that moo means moo.

Flops discards the remains of the launcher (which was incinerated by the back blast of the rocket firing) and diligently smothers the embers with his foot.

Dook: Good thing you know origami at that level. Most don't.

Flops: Perhaps that's for the best.

In the background a black, unmarked Sikhorsky Skycrane helicopter flies in and picks up the crashed saucer with a winch, and flies off. Dook looks on with concern.

Flops [patting Dook's shoulder reassuringly]: They'll be fine. Let's go.

Flops starts walking away. After a little while Dook catches up, holding a device the size of a washing machine over his head with both hands.

Dook [eagerly]: Can you fix this? I always wanted a tractor beam!

Flops: I'll take a look at it! That would be perfect on the blimp!

Cut to Dook and Flops standing in front of a white background, facing the camera, PSA style.

Flops: Remember, consent is not optional. Always discuss limits and safewords before play.

Dook: And don't forget the aftercare!

The screen goes black.

Dook [earnestly]: What was that about?

Flops [evasively]: Ehh... I have no idea either. Let's go grab a coffee before the next episode.

Credits roll.